You may have noticed this about yourself. Women are much more sensitive to vibration. A woman can be turned on more by a vibration she is getting from a man than his physical appearance. We like a well-groomed man. We like a handsome man. We like a well turned out, well dressed, well-spoken, clever man. What woman doesn’t. We also like Joe Rough too. Jeans and cowboy hat. We like Mr. Adventurer, the James Bond types. We like the homely bared chap that isn’t going to leave us for another woman. But vibration we feel. One woman friend of mine went to see her lover at work one day and the man sitting next her lover across the room had a vibration so strong and so magnetic for her that she couldn’t help noticing.
She kept looking over at him. He hadn’t noticed her. He was busy vibrating at his own frequency, but that frequency was her wavelength all right. She could not help herself, she gravitated towards him and even touched his elbow to make her presence known to him. He saw her and their eyes locked for a fleeting second. In that second they both knew that if they could arrange to meet somewhere alone, that was going to end up in the bedroom, and fast. Maybe it wouldn’t last, but there were sparks all over the place. She was hot for him and once he became Aware of her he fancied her too. This is not to say that a woman fancies a man with her eyes and he is going to fancy her right back.
FEAR OF REJECTION
This is a big one for both men and women. Women fear it more, but I will tell you a secret: men fear it just as much. Fear of rejection can keep you alone indefinitely.
Another close friend of mine had that problem. She was duly over this man for years and she was scheming all sorts of ways to get him alone in her house. He was dashing, good looking, a heartthrob. If he were a Hollywood film star he would have been a sex icon. But she couldn’t see that. She just saw it as her own wish. She was to him however ugly and fat and revolting. That is an extreme example. But it’s a point worth making, in case you think that liking or being able to tune into a man’s vibration is all you need to conclude that he is going to fancy you too. Not necessarily.
That is the risk factor, the factor of rejection. No one can take rejection really. No one takes rejection well, and because of that both sexes are reluctant to chance their arm on sexual and emotional encounters that may mean rejection. It can and is always quite hurtful and painful. That is one reason why men sometimes go with whores for sexual release. They can pay for sexual release without fear of rejection. The same goes for women and male prostitutes. It’s a way around rejection.
Fear of rejection - how to cope with it ...
You can’t live your whole life in fear of rejection. You have to jump over the wall sometime, and you may as well recognize that fact, unless you want to be alone. If you really are frightened and cannot jump over the wall and meet people and start to enjoy normal sexual relations with a man, then you must seek and find appropriate help. There are many organizations that are designed to help women overcome fears of rejection.
They can be found in every community, on the Net, in the yellow pages and in Local Newspapers. You have to join these encounter Groups and get out there and make an effort to combat those stifling social traps. Never believe you are the only one who has any fear. There is always another one who has the same problem.
LADIES, PLEASE BE REASSURED THAT THERE REALLY IS NO PROBLEM BIG ENOUGH THAT IT CANNOT FIND SOME SOLUTION.
Fear of rejection is a wicked one because it can keep us alone. And this is something that can be helped.
LOOKING FOR LOVE
Unless we have just got over a ghastly divorce and we are not ready, all of us, whether we want to admit it to ourselves or to each other are looking for love. Even in the most casual sexual flirtation, there is always that little voice whispering at the back of your mind, “could this man be the one for me?” Could he be Mr. Right?
Could he be my husband? Once you have shagged him, that feeling could grow more intense. There is nothing wrong with that. It’s genetically hard wired. We are always after Mr. Right. Mr. Permanent. Mr. Provider. We can’t help it. Its part of the Womanly condition and so it should be. Get comfortable with it. That is a condition that is unlikely to ever change. But men don’t think that whenever they shag a woman. Most women think they think as they do. Looking for Mrs. Right. He might be. But don’t count on it. He is most likely looking for another notch on his belt. He is most likely looking for a shag. Remember what I told you about the ram in a field full of sheep. He will shag the lot until he drops.
If you are the perfect fit, he might want to keep coming back for more. But don’t get all upset and hurt if he is into shagging you and then moving on. There is the risk. Sure, if you shag him half a dozen times you have every right to think there is something going on, a relationship. But it isn’t a good idea to start saving for your bottom drawer or looking meaningfully in Jewelry shop windows at the ring department. You start that too early in the game and even Mr. Right will get the message and may beat a hasty retreat. If he is into you and wants you he will let you know it. If you want him, that is. Here’s a really refreshing little tip for you. There is no such thing as lust. It is all love in his mind. It might be short lived, but it is love all the same. Long-range love is a different matter.
The quality of your sex life might be the determining factor.