Thursday, November 27, 2008

Bedroom - Preparing The Love Nest

You look and feel spectacular, so the next step is to prepare a riveting meeting space. You may think that he doesn't care about setting as long as he's getting you, but that's not completely true (Do you remember Ross from FRIENDS with the gorgeous woman in her rat-infested apartment?) The magic, excitement and thrill will start to seep away as soon as something becomes uncomfortable or falls apart.

So, again, you must take control. Design a space that will be yours (and his if you wish) to command and shine in. It is important that in your preparation, you have considered the importance of some of the 'tools of the trade.' With these tools, the tricks to passion will be at your fingertips, and it will appear that you exude this knowledge and confidence effortlessly.

Bed Basics

The most important tool in your repertoire is your bed. You should consider the bed's size, height, style and position in the room.

If you can afford it and have room for it, buy at least a queen-size mattress. Ideally, the bed frame should have no headboard or footboard to bang against. Height is also important as this can partially determine the ease of some of the intercourse options that may later be open to you. A high bed is not only dramatic, but also allows for a variety of exciting positions. Avoid futons and any mattress-on-the-floor options, as they can be torture on the knees. While some people love the idea of rocking the waves on a waterbed, be aware that waterbeds have rigid frames that can cause bruising and skin irritations.

Carefully consider your bed's position. If you've got the space, put the bed on a low platform in the center of your room. The bed will be elevated to a great height and accessible from any angle. If space dictates that you must have one side against a wall, make it your head-side! Nobody wants to be restrained from letting loose because they are afraid of hitting their funny - bone on the plaster wall.

Bedside Basics

If you plan to move your relationship past the kissing stage and into the bedroom, you should consider stocking your bedside table with a few 'basics' to simplify and intensify the passionate experience. Most of these items should be kept discreetly inside a drawer or flip-top open box and guilefully taken out if the appropriate time arises. The first critical bedside basic is, of course, are condoms. Next in line are lubricants. It is fine and even recommended to keep a pump bottle of lotion on top of the table but any specific lubricants such as KY jelly should be kept out of immediate sight. Also suggested for inclusion is a terry cloth washcloth (not tissues) for cleaning up the skin after any sticky act. After you read the following section, you may also decide to add a few adult toys to your bedside collection!

A note on setting the 'atmosphere' - if you plan on using candles to set the romantic mood be sure to keep them in glass holders out of hitting/kicking distance from the bed. The panic of a fire will not set either of your hearts racing for the right reasons! An alternative is to place your light switches (with dimming options) at accessible distances from your bed.


Even as women step into top-level management positions, take charge of their relationships with friends and lovers, and acquire more power in society as a whole, many are still unsure how to approach sex toys. Part of the stigma may be that they fear that they will have to go into seedy shops to check out the merchandise, while others worry that if they, their partners, and their sex lives were good enough, they wouldn't need these toys. Both of these concerns are unfounded.

Sex toys are called toys for a reason - they are fun. They can bring a person pleasure on his or her own, or enhance the strongest and most passionate intimate relationship. There does not have to be any embarrassment in the process of purchasing - if you don't want to go to a store, you can easily order by mail or over the Internet (and it'll be delivered to you in an unmarked envelope/box.)

Vibration Sensation

Perhaps the most versatile and popular of all sex toys is the vibrator. If you are looking to buy one, consider spending a little more money for more options. The plug-in variety generally has multiple speeds, which allows different plans for different demands.

Vibrators can be used on you, on him, or on both of you at the same time. If he likes to be in control (and you don't mind letting go,) give him the wand and let him make a little magic for you. You'll find that this does him good also, as he'll get off on your pleasure-induced moans.

If the tables turn, and you are giving him some manual or oral stimulation, you can enhance his pleasure by placing the vibrator on his backside. To put the vibrator to use during intercourse, it can be placed on your clitoris when the man is inside you, or it can be placed underneath you if you are lying on your stomach. In both of these positions, the vibrations will stimulate wild new sensations in both of you. The possibilities are many, and remember it's a toy, so feel free to play!

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