Sunday, April 13, 2008

What do you want in relationship?

People constantly say they want a relationship. Then when I ask them what they want in a relationship, they usually have to stop and think about it. Many men and many women don't know, but they always say they will know when it happens or the right one comes along.

Really? How will you know if you don't have a clue what you're looking for? I suggest that you sit down in a comfortable place and imagine the relationship you're looking for. Then imagine…in your body…what that would relationship would feel like. Make a list of the characteristics you really desire in a partner. Then make a list of qualities that you don't want in a partner.

Remember that believing is seeing. So believe that you can have this relationship and that you deserve it. As I've said countless times, you don't get what you want in this world, you get what you believe you can have.

Here are some of the characteristics in a relationship that are important to me:

Emotional closeness. You know when your partner is having a good or bad hair day and how you can compliment where they are. It's great to have someone there who knows that you just want someone to listen to you - that his or her job isn't to fix the situation.
Sharing. Spiritual, emotional and physical sharing. We share our minds, our hearts and our souls and yet we have permission to be ourselves and have our own space.
Communication. We share words and a common language. We understand each other and we are constantly trying to understand each other more. I am constantly fascinated and dazzled by my partner.
Touches that say more than words can mean.
Real moments together that make it all worthwhile
Best friends
Great lover
Honesty between us and patience with our foibles
The relationship is a safe haven for me to be me and for you to be you; a place where we can both grow to become more of who we are
I am cherished for being me and my partner is my hero for being who he is and for loving and cherishing me
A bridge of love that connects two people
Love. Love. Love.

What's important to you? Do you know? And if you know and you're not in a relationship, why not? Or if the relationship is not all that you would like it to be, what are you doing about it? It's your life…and it's all up to you to live it and be happy! Start today! And if you're happy in your relationship, drop me a line and tell me why. I would like to print them as examples of what is possible.

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