Friday, April 11, 2008

Top 18 Reasons Why Woman May Be Single

Are you a singleholic or are you dating one? Singleholics are addicted to being single. Signs of a singleholic are: you are so used to being single that you now can only watch certain kinds of tennis matches - singles only; the only lattes you can drink have single shots of espresso; and one is your favorite number.

All kidding aside, the truth is that singleholics are addicted to being single. They feel that special kind of excitement which happens every time a person gets into a new relationship; they always have a new audience in which to tell their story to; sex is always new and seemingly more exciting because they are having it with a different partner; and the pièce de résistance is they don't have to get involved.

Singleholics have a lot in common with shopoholics because dating is a lot like shopping. You pick it up, buy it, take it home and test it out. If you like it, then you keep it. If not, you return it and continue shopping for something else. The funny thing is that singleholics and shopoholics always need something more.

There are 79 million singles in the world today. If you're one of them, aren't you tired of being single? And, are you really happy being single? Being single isn't always fun. Dating is hard work. I know, I was in the dating trenches and on the front lines for a long time. So I've compiled a list of the top reasons people are single. See how many apply to you. But before you go down the list, I want you to write down why "you" are single.

Top Reasons You May be Single

  • You're a closet serial monogamist - you go from relationship to relationship dreaming of the right relationship. You don't want to give up on the dream. Like Martin Luther King, you have a dream, but you're not really interested in making that dream a reality.

  • Pick emotionally unavailable men and women

  • You're confused. Connect with another is called bonding not bondage.

  • Can't find anyone to date even though there are 79 million singles on the planet

  • Can't find a soul mate so you settle for a soul pet. Ladies, you now have multiple cats instead of having multiple orgasms. Guys, you really think a man's best friend is a dog

  • Really don't want to be in a relationship but you go through the motions anyway

  • You're an alpha female

  • You're a workaholic so of course there's no time for a relationship

  • You suffer from the "Give and Take" syndrome. You do all the giving and your former partners do all the taking.

  • You're not really healthy so you attract unhealthy people to you. Then you ask yourself "Why isn't this relationship working?" Duh!

  • You look at women as sex objects and arm charms

  • You look at men as success objects and investment bankers

  • Fear of getting hurt and rejected. You're terrified of it not working out

  • You don't have to be responsible for anyone but you. So you never have any competition for your time

  • Fear of failure - of not being a good partner

  • Your laundry list of "must have" characteristics in a partner, as in dealmakers and deal-breakers, is a mile long. And you've made up your mind that you couldn't possibly settle for anyone who didn't have ALL of the qualities.

  • Commitment phobia - if your partner won't commit and you're still hanging around with him or her, then you're just as commitment phobic. Otherwise why haven't you moved on?

  • You're over 45 and you've never been married, even though you say you want to be in a committed relationship. You're indeed very special. There are at least five reasons why you are still single. They include: you suffer from the "perfect one syndrome," you are definitely commitment phobic, most likely a serial monogamist which means you go from failed relationship to failed relationship, set in your ways, could be narcissistic, but must assuredly you are a picky, picky, picky perfectionist in every aspect of your life.

So how many of the above reasons apply to you? And what's the real story of your singelehood? Are you happy being single? If so, that's great. If not, do something about your being alone. You don't have to be a dating victim or a dating martyr. Get a new attitude - stop crying because it's over and start smiling because it happened. Then take another chance on love. Being single is usually a choice. After all, there are 79 million single people on the planet. I'm sure there's at least one for you.

The reason you have a neck is so you can stick it out and take the risk of having a happy relationship. Remember there are no perfect people nor perfect relationships. "Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect - it just means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections." As the song says, " One is the loneliest number…"

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