Q: I'm sick of dating. I'm thirty-five. I'm smart, handsome, and very successful. I've had some good relationships, but since they haven't been completely fulfilling, I move on. I'm looking for my soul-mate. What am I not doing to find her? -- Soul-mate Seeker
Dear Soul-mate Seeker,
There is not just one "her." So stop limiting yourself. You're driving yourself crazy. No wonder you can't find and keep a woman. You think there is only one perfect her, so you're never satisfied with any woman. Here's the deal - there is no perfect woman (other than me of course) and there is no perfect man. So wake up! Millions of women could be your soul-mate if you stopped having that "the ideal picture." Hint: it's called ideal because it's not real.
You want to find her? Start trolling but try doing dating differently: Try this strategy:
There is power in intention. Decide that you do want a soul-mate and a blissful relationship.
Stay focused on this intention.
Be authentic with yourself . Get rid of the internal fluff.
Make your actions consistent with your intention and authenticity.
Follow the law of physics. Since two things cannot occupy the same space at the same time, stop being self-absorbed, instead, focus on your partner's happiness and fulfillment. You'll be amazed at how fulfilled you'll feel and what a great relationship you'll have.
Q: If my boyfriend asks me to have sex on the first date, please tell me how to say no to him. - Can't Say No to Sex
Dear Can't Say No to Sex,
Want to know how to say no? Open your mouth and simply say, "NO. N-O" Which part of no don't you understand?
If you respect yourself, you absolutely won't sleep with him. And no man is your boyfriend before or after the first date. You need to do some self-esteem and some dating work. I suggest that you call me and set up a session and we'll get this squared away - right away. You need some coaching about appropriate dating behavior AND about keeping your lips and legs closed.