Wednesday, April 16, 2008

Q & A: "He is 10 years younger than me"

Q: I'm currently friends with a guy who is really sweet. I've kissed him and given him hugs and he's given them back. He wants to fool around with me and then eventually wants to have sex with me one day. What do I do now? I've told him how I feel about this, but I don't know what to do now. - Looking for Help

Dear Looking for Help,
Have either of you thought about just taking the time to get to know each other and being in the here and now instead of planning your future? You're both so busy worrying about tomorrow that you're not really taking advantage of today. There's always time to fool around later. Develop the other parts of the relationship first. You've told him what you want, keep your word - don't break it. Your guy will treat you the way you treat yourself.

Q: I have recently started dating a friend of mine. He is 10 years younger than me, but we have a blast together. I think about him constantly and I know he thinks about me, but I am scared of the age thing. (I am 32 he's 22). When we started dating, it was right after I broke up with me last boyfriend, so I am wondering if I am rebounding, or if there may really be something between us. What do you think? -The Older Woman

Dear The Older Woman,
This is not an age thing; it's a desperation thing. Your instincts are probably correct. There "may" be something between the two of you but my hit is that you're definitely on the rebound and your friend looked "really" good and he was available. Take this relationship slow. Most importantly, do some work on yourself to heal the old relationship so you're really available for this new one or your next one.

Q: I am 24 years old and have been seeing the same woman for just over a year now. She is a wonderful and beautiful person. The only problem in our relationship is that I keep talking about my exes. I don't have any contact with them, nor desire to be with them. I just keep saying little things that really hurt her, and make her question my love for her. This is the woman I want to marry and spend the rest of my life with. I just don't want to lose her over the stupid things I say. I have said many things in the past and lately, I know she is getting very irritated at this, and it always upsets her for at least a day or two. It just kills me to see her upset, knowing it was my fault. How can I stop talking about my exes? - Can't Stop Talking About My Ex

Dear Can't Stop Talking About My Ex,
Exert a little control over yourself and your mouth. Stop living in the past and start appreciating the woman you're with. By talking about your former women, you're making your girlfriend feel insecure about herself and the relationship. This is a form of control and manipulation on your part.

You claim you love her, then stop hurting her. As an added incentive, buy her an expensive present every time you open your mouth and stick your foot into it. Plus, do something very special for her. Give her a day of beauty at an exclusive spa; take her away for a long weekend; take her on a buying spree; and always send her a dozen of her favorite flowers every, and I do mean every time, you talk about an ex. So, if in a conversation you mention an ex twice, then send her two dozen flowers. Put your money where your mouth is. And, start living in your heart or you'll be living alone.

1 comment:

  1. Dear Becky I think I need some advice... I am in a new relationship with a fab-u-lous guy & just found out hes only 29 ! We have a great time when we are together and he is such a charmer i thought id died and gone to heaven!!! Is it wrong ??? I feel now that I know how old he is im a little hesitant to let go and talk about how I feel - Is it that it is just wrong...Pls help ! He is soooooooo yummy - what are your thoughts???